Editing The Wickedictionary (section)

==V==
'''Vacation:''' ''n.'' a perilous journey usually to a far flung destination, transported in a large flying metal tube with wings. Designed to provide respite and refreshment from one's daily toil, but invariably results in jet lag, dysentery, and extra overtime to pay for the said pleasure.<ref>Derek Abbott, 2010</ref> 

'''Vegetarian:''' ''n.''  1. an old tribal word for 'bad hunter.'

'''Vegetarian:''' ''n.''  2. a herbivorous individual with Buddhist tendencies. One who rejects the ghoulish concept of forking animal remains down the gullet, preferring to dine upon the corpses of plants and their detachable reproductive organs (popularly known as 'fruit').

'''Veneer:''' ''n.'' a thin, finely finished exterior that effectively conceals the underlying substance; e.g., a mortician's smile or the civility that prevails at a Hollywood party.

'''Viagra:''' ''n.'' a tiny blue pill that stiffens one's resolve to fight against junk email.<ref>Contributed specially for ''The Wickedictionary'' by Derek Abbott, 2010</ref>

'''Victim:''' ''n.'' one who colludes with his own downfall.<ref>Ian McEwin</ref>

'''Victory:''' ''n.'' that which goes to the player who makes the next-to-last mistake.<ref>Savielly Grigorievitch Tartakower</ref> 

'''Video camera:''' ''n.'' an audiovisual recording device thrust into the hands of the public so that future social historians might develop migraines looking at our school plays, pet tricks, weddings, and christenings.

'''Video game:''' ''n.'' 1. an electronic form of opium, consumed by stony-eyed young addicts either at home or in dark communal dens, where their families occasionally must venture to retrieve them.

'''Video game:''' ''n.'' 2. that which increases a child's imagination if the game involves Italian plumbers knocking out sentient turtles whilst consuming magic mushrooms and which increases retardation if a child repeatedly accesses WWII simulations.<ref>Contributed specially for ''The Wickedictionary'' by Adam Darius Mistry, 2010</ref>

'''Virtue:''' ''n.'' that which is more enjoyable when a man repents his faults rather than avoiding them.

'''Virtues:''' ''n. pl.'' certain abstentions.<ref>Ambrose Bierce</ref>